I told my mother-in-law that my house was her house, and she said, ‘Get the hell off my property.’ Joan Rivers
Conscience is a mother-in-law whose visit never ends. H L Mencken
A person often catches a cold when a mother-in-law comes to visit. Patients mentioned mothers-in-law so often that we came to consider them a common cause of disease in the United States. Thomas Holmes
Back of every achievement is a proud wife and a surprised mother-in-law. Brooks Hays
The awe and dread with which the untutored savage contemplates his mother-in-law are amongst the most familiar facts of anthropology. Sir James George Frazer
I can always tell when the mother in law’s coming to stay; the mice throw themselves on the traps. Les Dawson
I wanted to do something nice so I bought my mother-in-law a chair. Now they won’t let me plug it in. Henry Youngman
I took my mother-in-law to Madame Tussaud’s Chamber of Horrors, and one of the attendants said, ‘Keep her moving sir, we’re stock-taking’. Les Dawson
Adam was the luckiest man; he had no mother-in-law. Mark Twain
I should, many a good day, have blown my brains out, but for the recollection that it would have given pleasure to my mother-in-law; and, even then, if I could have been certain to haunt her – but I won’t dwell upon these trifling family matters. Lord Byron