Johnny Carson Quotes

The difference between divorce and legal separation is that a legal separation gives a husband time to hide his money. Johnny Carson

Democracy means that anyone can grow up to be president, and anyone who doesn’t grow up can be vice president. Johnny Carson

If life was fair, Elvis would be alive and all the impersonators would be dead. Johnny Carson

Anytime four New Yorkers get into a cab together without arguing, a bank robbery has just taken place. Johnny Carson

My success just evolved from working hard at the business at hand each day. Johnny Carson

The only thing money gives you is the freedom of not worrying about money. Johnny Carson

He couldn’t ad-lib a fart after a baked-bean dinner. Johnny Carson

New York is an exciting town where something is happening all the time, most unsolved. Johnny Carson

People will pay more to be entertained than educated. Johnny Carson